Here are five guys that do not look like they need to be playing football. I went ahead and gave them more fitting careers based on their appearance.
5. Andre Smith – OT – Bengals
Likely career: Mall security guard
Andre I understand lineman are supposed to be big. However, I always assumed that they at least had a little bit of muscle. I saw parts of your body move during your combine run that I hope to never see again in my life. I thought about putting the video up, but went against that notion in an effort to protect the well-being of others. I know, I’m a gentleman and a scholar.
4. LenDale White – RB – Titans
Likely career: Bus driver
The first picture might be a bit of an exaggeration, but so what, it’s still funny. White is currently listed at 235 pounds and that’s after he lost almost 30 pounds and 12% of his body weight this offseason. His secret? No more tequila. If you aren’t going to change careers, you look like you could at least change positions.
3. Jeff Reed – K – Steelers
Likely career: Male gigolo
You could probably have almost every kicker in the NFL on this list, but that wouldn’t be any fun. However, Jeff Reed is. Just by looking at him you know he’s one of those guys that’s always down for the cause. Therefore, he could be found pleasing women across the US like Duece Bigalow.
2. Jay Cutler – QB – Bears
Likely career: Fraternity Member
Cutler looks more likely to be in a frat wearing Dockers above the knee, a Guy Harvey shirt, boat shoes, Costa Del Mar sunglasses with croakies, and a camouflaged hat backwards, all while doing keg stands, than he does throwing a football. Starting from the left: Cutler before his intramural flag football game. Cutler on blow. And Cutler saying, “psshh, no way bro.”
1. Ben Roethlisberger – QB – Steelers
Likely career: Home Depot employee
Big Ben just looks like the average guy that likes to drink beer and grill hamburgers. When you watch him play, it looks like he doesn’t have an athletic bone in his body. That’s when you start to wonder how he got a $100 million contract.